Hearts and Hangovers
Seize the Day!
Latest posts by Summer Willow Fitch (see all)
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- The Relationship Chronicles:You Ain’t in Love (Finale) - July 13, 2015
“Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero“-Horace
Translation: “Seize the day, put very little trust in tomorrow (the future)”.
When making arbitrary decisions like what to do with your loving feelings, calling on the opinions of others will render a multitude of choices. At the end of every discussion most people say something along the lines of, “Life is short. Do what makes you happy”, “Love is a risk”or “Only you know what’s best for you”. These may seem like cliché answers when in the midst of making your best attempt to establish a standpoint, solve a problem or make a clear choice that you are happy with.
However, there have not been more true statements. Carpe diem expresses that the future is unforeseen and suggests that you must create your future with your choices instead of leaving it all to chance. Everything WILL fall into place but why leave that to chance? You can actively guide matters in your life to fall where YOU would have them; into the places that you want and desire them to!
When it comes to love and making a choice that you are happy with (who to date, court, marry) applying this mode of thought is as effective with matters of the heart as it is for making a job change or relocation decision. Let’s unpack this, shall we:
“Life is short. Do what makes you happy” – Unless you are young and/or newly entering the dating scene, I am certain that you have experiences in the relationship-kitty and know at least what you do not want. If you have spent time dating someone who fits the mold in your life don’t let them go if you are truly happy. If you can say without a doubt that she is the one – do what makes you happy and live life happily with her. If the good times trump the bad, work out your differences with him. If you have found yourself referring to them as a husband/wife or the one, why not decide to be with that person. Forever is NOT a long time so- by the time you jump from one to the next or back and forth – you may find yourself looking back on your ex saying “She was the one who got away”. Be happy now: take no stock in what others think you should have, be or do. If you choose happiness now you are creating happiness in the future.
Love is a risk. – True indeed; So is eating those chili-cheese-fries [side eye] or buying that car. EVERYTHING can be viewed as risk. You just must be educated, follow your heart and know that some odds are greater than others. I know many who have never had their heart broken. They have never been in love because they cut things off before actually getting there…or out of the discomfort of a disagreement. If that works for you fine – your choice [no judgement zone]. However, did you know that coming THROUGH difficult times with someone you loves makes your love stronger. The wager is not whether or not you will have the perfect relationship–because you won’t and you will lose that bet [Insert Price Is Right Loser Horn Here]. But the odds that you can make it through difficult times are less risky when you go through those times with someone who has shown you that they can withstand difficulties, loves and respects themselves as much as you and is dedicated to seeing you smile and growing. That is called a keeper. and you will NEVER hit the lottery if you don’t play! #SweepstakesWinners
Only you know what’s best for you. – This is the part that I need you to read very closely. Do not allow anyone to influence what you know and feel. You are the one in the relationship. You know that person intimately and you know that you are even more alive because they are a part of your life. If the person that you are dating does not fit the physical or financial description of your normal “type” but makes you happy, Do not listen to your small minded and single friends who encourage you to enjoy the “benefits” of the relationship but not the commitment. Or are YOU the one with the small mind? Everything may not be exactly how you want it, but if you ask the universe [Insert your own higher power indicator here] for love, commitment, happiness, a confidant and friend YOU CAN GET IT and when you do… KEEP IT!
It is human for people to make mistakes and be unsure. However at some point; you must forgive (even if you decide to leave), mistakes must be rectified, behaviors improved, and life goes on. Do not throw the baby out with the bathwater [there is another great saying about relationships] CLEAN IT UP! Make your environment (physically, mentally and emotionally) as inviting as you can and welcome in Love.
Do not sacrifice the truest parts of your heart compromising because of fear or the opinions of others. Everything you want you can have. It is that simple. Choose it according to what is best for you (Healthy Relationships). Choose it no matter the past (Love is Risky). Choose it not knowing the future (Be swift or someone else will). Choose it or lose it. That simple.
With that being said, this is for your heart:
“Happiness is a choice. Fate is what you end up with when you don’t. Don’t be random – be radical”
…..but if all else fails, drink like a high-roller and take a risk
1 3/4 oz Dubonnet® French vermouth
8 oz ginger ale
1 lemon spiral
Pour Dubonnet over ice cubes in a collins glass, and fill with ginger ale. Add a spiral of lemon peel, and serve.
Are You Drinking or Thinking?
*If you have a specific question (anonymously, of course) or a topic you want covered, send an e-mail to: contact@SummerWillow.com
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